So deeply honored to be included here 😍 and damn did some of these HIT. Number 5 (!!!) leading into number 6- I suspect 40s will be a delicious decade and I. Am. Excited.
I loved all of this--and just feel like saying hell yes to all of it. :) And so lovely to be included in that list of beautiful women writers. 💜 Have you read any of Sheila Heti's work? Motherhood is the book that really made me feel woken up by what she was doing--exploring the question of having a child, of what mothering actually is. It's deceptive because it's not about becoming a mother or its aftermath--it's about (spoiler alert) choosing not to, of seeing the many ways that mothering is complicated, ever-present, and the relationships we hold to other women as well as ourselves.
I also really love Death By Landscape by Elvia Wilk (written about it a ton in my essays) and anything Anne Carson. Also loved How to Think Like a Woman by Regan Penaluna--actually wrote Regan and we connected over a love of women philosophers and their overlooked history, she's a really generous, thoughtful writer. 💜
Thank you so much for this list, Freya! Most of the women writers I’ve read are no longer in the land of the living. I’ve been trying to familiarize myself with contemporary women writers and this is so helpful. Adding all of their names to my TBR list 😍
You women bring me so much joy and are the newsletters I look forward to the most! Ahhh the shower is such a meditative/inspo spot for me too. 35?! 😭 Come to think of it, I can remember weird shit happening after 35.
It was a show in Canada in the early aughts I think? Then had a recent resurgence on social media and has since BLOOOOWN UP bc it’s so damn feel good and cute. I can’t get enough. I think a lot of people with rough/non existent childhoods are healing their inner kid with it. 🥹🙋🏻♀️
I loved turning 40. You’re right in the pocket of embodying your truest self and not giving a shit what other people think.
My late 40s, not so amazing. Aside from the extensive bodily damage from Long COVID since age 44, I have recently fully entered perimenopause. No fun. Everything is either drying out, thinning out, or on fire. This should be an interesting several years.
I am so sorry. Ugh. My sister is going through perimenopause which has prompted me to research it more. It’s mind blowing the lack of information and understanding for women’s hormones, the doctors don’t know anything, it isn’t being researched nor funded to be researched. Infuriating. I bought Dr. Jen Gunter’s book for her and I still need to get a copy for myself.
I haven’t read Dr. Gunter’s book but I just finished Hot and Bothered by NYT writer Jancee Dunn. It was very good and funny at times too. Tons of info and resources, but not presented in a staid way. I recommend it.
Turning 50 this year. And yes, almost 50 feels very different from 40. Dr. Gunter’s menopause book is great. Knowing what to expect and what options are available is helpful to have early on.
Ugh sorry for this. I’ve been having a great time at 50 but maybe that means I haven’t truly hit this rough patch yet. I just get my period now all the f’ing time which means I’m a zitty teenager again…and luckily for my BF, still horney…for now!
As evocative and dreamy as ever, Jenovia. ✨ It is my immense honor to be paddling down the river of sisterhood with you, hermana!! 😌
And thank you so SO much for including me in your list - OMG. I'm deaded. 😵🤯🫠 Thank you for lifting up voices and modeling the kind of human I want to be in the world. 💚
As it is mine, hermana! 💗 I love your words and the generous way you share your special, magical world with us!! Thank you for always supporting me and being so wonderful!!
“The deepest truth I know about myself is that I most likely will never create anything as beautiful nor as powerful as the life I have made for myself alone and the life that I choose to share with my partner.” — such a beautiful sentiment, Jenovia.
I often say to myself — the thing you’re looking for is staring you right in the face. As an encapsulation of this idea :)
So interesting to hear your perspective on divorce memoirs (especially those from relatively young authors), because I've started seeing them everywhere—and wondered if it was just me noticing more of them after my own divorce! Clearly not.
I adored every item on this list, #2 and #9 feeling especially resonant right now. And: the James Baldwin quote! The weird aches and pains and bodily mysteries of getting older! And the beauty of the life you're creating alone and with your partner—whew. 😮💨 More of all this, please.
It is not just you, the divorce memoirs are EVERYWHERE! And YAY! I'm so glad you enjoyed it. I wanted to keep it light and fun after the emotional exhaustion of publishing a heavier piece. Your most recent newsletter was GORGEOUS btw. I absolutely loved it. Valentine's Day for the both of us ❤️ Sending you a big squeeze through the ether.
Light and heavy, I’ll take it all! And: thank you, my friend. ❤️ I imagine it served as context for why your own Valentine’s Day piece was such a perfect, poignant, bittersweet and hopeful start to that morning!
The deepest truth I know about myself is that I most likely will never create anything as beautiful nor as powerful as the life I have made for myself alone and the life that I choose to share with my partner. The greatest challenge that will always stand before me is creating something to equal its glory. The truth of my life has always been greater than fiction and whilst I’ve spent many years in contempt with this notion, I’ve finally surrendered to it
THIS really hit something in me this morning. I so resonate. Thank you
Also no.7 - absolutely agree, suffering plays a huge ‘positive’ part in our growth, have been saying it all my life
No.8 - I often get gripped by fear to write, yet to figure out what’s that about
I'm so glad you enjoyed this piece, Natalia. Thank you so much for taking the time to read it.
You get to know yourself in the most intimate of ways when you endure suffering and in that knowing it can birth a deep inner confidence that is unwavering. That confidence and inner faith can carry you to the most wonderful of places.
Gripped by fear in a way that you don't write or do you manage to still get it out?
I love this piece. I also love the power of women collectively withdrawing from the pressure we put on our looks…I’ve been circling that both in writing and living (approaching 40). Ceasing to care, but together. Imagine the power. Imagine the bandwidth. And also: I do believe that the highest success you can have is your life as your best work. It’s for you, anyway. It all is.
I could not agree more to both life as your best work and collectively drawing from the pressure we put on our looks!! "It's for you, anyway. It all is." The TRUTH!! 🎯 I'm so glad you enjoyed this piece, Isabel and I'm so happy our paths crossed!
My pleasure! They are so genuine, kind, and write so beautifully. 💕
So deeply honored to be included here 😍 and damn did some of these HIT. Number 5 (!!!) leading into number 6- I suspect 40s will be a delicious decade and I. Am. Excited.
❤️🔥 Yes! Be excited! ! 40's are my FAVORITE decade so far!!! I tell every woman I know that is younger than me not to fret. 40's are glorious.
Absolutely. It’s great
https://open.substack.com/pub/madisonhuizinga?r=6x9gm&utm_medium=ios
Madison is one of the best writers I’ve seen on here. Very perceptive essays—
Thank you for the rec, Karl!
I loved all of this--and just feel like saying hell yes to all of it. :) And so lovely to be included in that list of beautiful women writers. 💜 Have you read any of Sheila Heti's work? Motherhood is the book that really made me feel woken up by what she was doing--exploring the question of having a child, of what mothering actually is. It's deceptive because it's not about becoming a mother or its aftermath--it's about (spoiler alert) choosing not to, of seeing the many ways that mothering is complicated, ever-present, and the relationships we hold to other women as well as ourselves.
I also really love Death By Landscape by Elvia Wilk (written about it a ton in my essays) and anything Anne Carson. Also loved How to Think Like a Woman by Regan Penaluna--actually wrote Regan and we connected over a love of women philosophers and their overlooked history, she's a really generous, thoughtful writer. 💜
Thank you so much for this list, Freya! Most of the women writers I’ve read are no longer in the land of the living. I’ve been trying to familiarize myself with contemporary women writers and this is so helpful. Adding all of their names to my TBR list 😍
The part about how your real life can be greater than fiction takes the pressure off my writing to be this perfect recreation of things!
Feeling/viewing it that way has really done wonders in the pressure department for me ❤️🔥
So honored to be included here. ❤️ And in such a piece! I loved every word.
so grateful our paths crossed 💗
1. To be in the company of such women. I have also now discovered more to follow myself 🖤
2. I need a notepad that works in the shower. But at the same time to stop taking my phone into the shower.
3. I am still working on this. So much of my self worth is tied to productivity.
6. They say there is a physical change at the cellular level around age 35. I believe that is when the weird shit starts.
8. I need more space to conjure.
Blessed Be.
You women bring me so much joy and are the newsletters I look forward to the most! Ahhh the shower is such a meditative/inspo spot for me too. 35?! 😭 Come to think of it, I can remember weird shit happening after 35.
Take the space! Conjure that magic! ✨🔮😍
Bowing to you dear human. So honored to be part of your brilliant mind’s musings over here on Substack.
And how am I just now learning about Namalan!? I used to want to be a puppeteer. ❤️❤️❤️
And I you! ❤️🔥
It was a show in Canada in the early aughts I think? Then had a recent resurgence on social media and has since BLOOOOWN UP bc it’s so damn feel good and cute. I can’t get enough. I think a lot of people with rough/non existent childhoods are healing their inner kid with it. 🥹🙋🏻♀️
I loved turning 40. You’re right in the pocket of embodying your truest self and not giving a shit what other people think.
My late 40s, not so amazing. Aside from the extensive bodily damage from Long COVID since age 44, I have recently fully entered perimenopause. No fun. Everything is either drying out, thinning out, or on fire. This should be an interesting several years.
I am so sorry. Ugh. My sister is going through perimenopause which has prompted me to research it more. It’s mind blowing the lack of information and understanding for women’s hormones, the doctors don’t know anything, it isn’t being researched nor funded to be researched. Infuriating. I bought Dr. Jen Gunter’s book for her and I still need to get a copy for myself.
I haven’t read Dr. Gunter’s book but I just finished Hot and Bothered by NYT writer Jancee Dunn. It was very good and funny at times too. Tons of info and resources, but not presented in a staid way. I recommend it.
Turning 50 this year. And yes, almost 50 feels very different from 40. Dr. Gunter’s menopause book is great. Knowing what to expect and what options are available is helpful to have early on.
Ugh sorry for this. I’ve been having a great time at 50 but maybe that means I haven’t truly hit this rough patch yet. I just get my period now all the f’ing time which means I’m a zitty teenager again…and luckily for my BF, still horney…for now!
I love being in my 40s. You might like Florence Given. She is in her 20s but is so wise!
I love it too! Best decade yet for me. I’ll check her out! 💗
As evocative and dreamy as ever, Jenovia. ✨ It is my immense honor to be paddling down the river of sisterhood with you, hermana!! 😌
And thank you so SO much for including me in your list - OMG. I'm deaded. 😵🤯🫠 Thank you for lifting up voices and modeling the kind of human I want to be in the world. 💚
As it is mine, hermana! 💗 I love your words and the generous way you share your special, magical world with us!! Thank you for always supporting me and being so wonderful!!
💚UGH APPRECIATE YOU UGH ✨😭✨
YOU ARE WONDERFUL.
What lovefest you and I get into 😉😁
“The deepest truth I know about myself is that I most likely will never create anything as beautiful nor as powerful as the life I have made for myself alone and the life that I choose to share with my partner.” — such a beautiful sentiment, Jenovia.
I often say to myself — the thing you’re looking for is staring you right in the face. As an encapsulation of this idea :)
Thank you, Michael!! You just get it, you always do!! 🙏
So interesting to hear your perspective on divorce memoirs (especially those from relatively young authors), because I've started seeing them everywhere—and wondered if it was just me noticing more of them after my own divorce! Clearly not.
I adored every item on this list, #2 and #9 feeling especially resonant right now. And: the James Baldwin quote! The weird aches and pains and bodily mysteries of getting older! And the beauty of the life you're creating alone and with your partner—whew. 😮💨 More of all this, please.
It is not just you, the divorce memoirs are EVERYWHERE! And YAY! I'm so glad you enjoyed it. I wanted to keep it light and fun after the emotional exhaustion of publishing a heavier piece. Your most recent newsletter was GORGEOUS btw. I absolutely loved it. Valentine's Day for the both of us ❤️ Sending you a big squeeze through the ether.
Light and heavy, I’ll take it all! And: thank you, my friend. ❤️ I imagine it served as context for why your own Valentine’s Day piece was such a perfect, poignant, bittersweet and hopeful start to that morning!
The deepest truth I know about myself is that I most likely will never create anything as beautiful nor as powerful as the life I have made for myself alone and the life that I choose to share with my partner. The greatest challenge that will always stand before me is creating something to equal its glory. The truth of my life has always been greater than fiction and whilst I’ve spent many years in contempt with this notion, I’ve finally surrendered to it
THIS really hit something in me this morning. I so resonate. Thank you
Also no.7 - absolutely agree, suffering plays a huge ‘positive’ part in our growth, have been saying it all my life
No.8 - I often get gripped by fear to write, yet to figure out what’s that about
I'm so glad you enjoyed this piece, Natalia. Thank you so much for taking the time to read it.
You get to know yourself in the most intimate of ways when you endure suffering and in that knowing it can birth a deep inner confidence that is unwavering. That confidence and inner faith can carry you to the most wonderful of places.
Gripped by fear in a way that you don't write or do you manage to still get it out?
I still write regardless, always push through it 😃
Yes! I’m so happy to hear that!
I love this piece. I also love the power of women collectively withdrawing from the pressure we put on our looks…I’ve been circling that both in writing and living (approaching 40). Ceasing to care, but together. Imagine the power. Imagine the bandwidth. And also: I do believe that the highest success you can have is your life as your best work. It’s for you, anyway. It all is.
I could not agree more to both life as your best work and collectively drawing from the pressure we put on our looks!! "It's for you, anyway. It all is." The TRUTH!! 🎯 I'm so glad you enjoyed this piece, Isabel and I'm so happy our paths crossed!