Log Off Once In a While
Offline, Meta AI Profiles, Dead Internet Theory, & elder Millennial angst
I’ve been soul-deep in daydreams and Middlemarch by George Eliot.
NYC in the fall/winter is so damn romantic on its own, but add the love of your life, a fireplace, and some holiday lights…I don’t even know what’s happening anymore.
Am I in a romcom?
Am I dead and don’t know it?
Who knows?!
I don’t care!
It feels amazing!
As cozy as the holidays were, I’m glad they’re over. There is something about regular life living that charms me into deep devotion to my goals and dreams—a calm that promotes razor-sharp focus and precise action leading to accomplishment that creates the happiest version of myself. Don’t get me wrong; I love and need the time off that accompanies holidays. The respite from regular life allows me to return with renewed passion and a burning desire to participate.
I also took two months off from this newsletter and most social media. With the exception of some Instagram stories (I’m still a sucker for an adorable animal video), I barely used it.
My brain and focus feel regenerated.
I feel an incredible lightness within being offline, and I leaned into it like never before. It’s imperative to my wellbeing that I take breaks from being online throughout the year. I think of it as a soul sabbatical and highly encourage everyone on earth who owns a smart phone to do the same.
The false sense of urgency and annoying tugging that gnaws at my mind when carrying around a mini computer ceases to exist. Even the way my body feels moving around in the physical world is different. Small beauties that I would miss because my nose was in a phone were everywhere I turned. I was mesmerized by life in the real world because I was constantly looking up and not down. I was paying attention again and with that particular kind of attention comes the magical whisperings from within that connects me to the divine.
I almost didn’t want to return at all.
Social media, for me, these days feels like I’m feeding my mind ultra-processed junk food, and seeing as I want to be prolific, I’ve got to treat it like the sacred temple it is.
Which means far less consuming and much more creating.
Then there is this:
What in the dystopian fuckshit is this?
Dead Internet Theory much?
How is this real life right now?!
I’m not really into conspiracy theories, pero like, if it quacks, has feathers, and waddles, you’re telling me it’s not a duck?
Look, I barely want to know what my real person friends are doing on social media.
This gives me the heebie-jeebies, and after I attended a Harvard AI Symposium last year where they talked about using AI to diagnose mental illness (!!!!!!!) and prescribe drugs, I feel even worse. Health insurance (I’m looking at you, UHC) has already been utilizing AI to approve/reject claims.
I’m starting to loathe this particular brand of social media, and this news shoves me deeper into my ever increasing repulsion towards maintaining a full presence online.
I’ve written briefly about Millennials being the first generation to grow up then grow old on social media and what that might look like. We remember a time before it existed, and most of us have seamlessly adapted to it, embracing it with child-like enthusiasm. I have friends—fellow Millennials—who make A LOT of money from it. (I’m talking six figures for one brand deal consisting of a couple of appearances and posts.) The funds can potentially be incredible, but I have also seen the stress and neglect offline that comes from living your life online.
In 2023, I felt the early symptoms of my now crushing disdain for social media begin to flare up. I hated how much I found myself with my phone in hand, head down, completely disconnected from reality as soon as the warm glow of my screen flicked on. Silences were filled with desperate attempts (I still can’t believe terrible choreographed dancing was/is a thing online) to capture my attention and I took the bait more often than not.
Being bombarded with so many thoughts, opinions, and global news feels unsustainable and overwhelming, which reminds me of one of my favorite tweets:
True. Sad. Hilarious.
It feels bizarre.
Why am I reading what stranger Sally thinks about what stranger Bethany is doing with her dog?
We all do it.
We get lost in threads of strangers arguing about things that have nothing to do with any of us because a little bit of stranger mess can be fun but then we take it too far and lose precious moments of time to our overindulgent voyeurism.
When I am reading that Sally thinks Bethany is a monster for docking her dog’s tail even though Bethany adopted Walter with his tail already docked, I’m lost in the sauce. Then the other strangers weigh in and OMG I CAN NEVER HAVE THAT TIME BACK.
This is when I yell: PICK UP A BOOK, JENOVIA!
*
My disdain for the mainstream social media apps feels isolating because it seems like you can’t do anything creative without maintaining a regular presence online which I understand, that’s just life right now and the rebel/adventurer in me wants to reject all of that to forge a new path in the social media landscape.
If legacy media as we know it can die, why can’t social media as we know it be murked along with it?
The one-minute video hits that have spread online like a plague, the ones people just can’t seem to get enough of, read as mass disassociation to me—which is a whole post on its own.
Those short videos scramble my brain and body into oblivion. It’s why I don’t have TikTok downloaded on my phone. I used it for less than a month years ago and swiftly deleted it.
The most tolerable social media for me is Notes on Substack, and even then, there are many days when I wish we had the option to turn them off completely. (I don’t care that I can make my inbox my home screen! Give me an OPT OUT COMPLETELY button and the option to turn it back on at leisure, please.)
Spending too much time on any social media app, where my world becomes increasingly smaller the more I use it, is a nightmare choice I refuse to keep making for myself.
I hope that we keep leaning into the weirdness that comes from being a living human being, cultivate the communities that promote genuine connection, and ruthlessly curate what we consume when we are not creating.
*
People constantly talk and write about logging off and how bad social media use can be for us, but I rarely see them do anything about it. I would love to know if any of you have actually taken significant breaks (a month or longer) from being online and how that felt for you?
Also, please tell me in the comments I’m not the only one completely repulsed by AI-generated users on Instagram. I’m also here for any random thoughts, experiences you have to share. Go wild.
Writing this newsletter is what I love most about being online and as always, I’m honored that you take the time to read it.
I’ve got some fun things planned for paid posts—like the reveal of my writing desk/altar (she is a BEAUTY) and more in 2025.
It feels great to be back, now put your phone down and go do something in real life!
🕷️ Thank you for reading JENOVIA’S WEB. Restack on Notes, leave a comment, or hit the heart button if you enjoyed this post. I love hearing from you! 🕸️
Love always,
Jenovia
Soul sabbatical!!! I need one of those!! - I don’t have social media in my phone and I like it that way. I wish I could let it go completely. Maybe Brian the AI relationship expert is my last straw.
You may have just convinced me to take Instagram off my phone. I already took Facebook off a long time ago. But most of what’s in my IG feed are celebs or ads. LOTS of ads about makeup for women over 50 (she says, clinging to the last six months of 49 😩). It’s not real life, and this is before AI accounts.